My name is Alycia, it means truth.  When I was young I didn't like my name, I wanted it to be my mom's name, Kathleen, so that's what I told people when I was five years old.  I was raised in the church... I truly desired a relationship with God, but I gave up because I never felt good enough; I always felt condemned and that I did not have a place to belong, at church or at home, I believed a lie.  In my teenage years into adulthood I dealt with cutting, suicide attempts, anorexia/bulemia, cigarettes, alcohol, drug experimenting, immorality, divorce, educational acheivements, miscarriages, social climbing, living in the future, living in the past... going to church, I most always went to church.

 

I had finally had enough of myself, nothing was getting me out of the pain I was running from.   Feeling broken, crushed, and hard hearted - I had made a list of how my husband should change, that would make me feel better and I decided I would pray it into existence (I just shake my head, in laughter, at my niavate).  I went to a  conference and saw an authentic relationship with God I wanted.  The only common denominator, with all of the people in ministry I admired, was that they spent every day time with Jesus... that's it, I had my mandate.

 

Monday, morning I got out my list.  Not knowing what to do with that list of items, I decided to find out what the bible had to say about changing my husband ( My List) At the same time I submerged myself in Joyce Meyer teaching, reading all of her books, listening to every teaching tape (yes, casette tapes) series, and watching her on TV while I cleaned the house.  As I searched the scripture and listened to Joyce Meyer, I realized, Jesus was not about changing my circumstance, but my circumstance changing me.  I needed to take the proverbial log out of my own eye, while trying to take the speck of dust out of my husbands eye.  I also learned, prayer was not about getting my way.

 

My husband played too many sports, I learned the bible is about running the race of life to get the crown of life.

My husband did not finish the crown moulding, I learned the bible was about completeing the good work Jesus had started

My husband had so many problems, I learned I needed to look at my own problems and work on them

My husband needed to be happy with his job, I learned it is a gift from God to accept one's lot in life and enjoy the work you've been given

 

I would look up scripture on my list topic.  Then I would hand write each scripure; ponder it, put into action what I could, and crafted a prayer using the scripture.  I prayed each scripture out loud every day for a couple of years. These are my prayers...

 

At first it was a struggle to get out of bed, I was NOT a morning person.  I had 18 month old twins who were not sleeping through the night. I would fall asleep in the chair, but as least I was up.  As the mornings went on, my intrigue with the bible grew.  Then, I discovered Beth Moore and bible studies, which was as life altering as Joyce Meyers teaching.  Everything I had been taught in church began to come alive.  My heart of stone was being replaced with a heart of flesh.  I was so grateful to cry.  Some mornings it felt like a magicians scarf was coming out of my soul, the pain and the issues were tied to each other, but as I opened my heart, and allowed Jesus to pull the scarf, the others came out with it.  And, he kept pulling and pulling and pulling and pulling and pulling...  Then he would fill that place with love, acceptance, peace, grace... It is still going on, as I learn to practice what he is teaching me... I am growing up in all things Jesus.

 

After several years of opening up my heart, looking at my own ways, learning how to parent my own children, how the Lord was parenting me, and how I was parented, I just kep on saying to myself, "This all feels so extreme.  God you are asking me to do such extreme things. This faith thing just feels so extreme."  I pondered for months, this faith is an extreme sport.  My brother built a 10 foot, double skate board ramp in our back yard in the 80's.  He was surfing and snowboarding and skating... Letting Jesus into my heart, listening to his voice, following the way of peace just felt like those EXTREMES.  My emotions didn't want to forgive my husband, or be patient with my children, or make ammends with family members I had hurt, or stop negative behaviors like smoking, or look into my permiscuous past.  On and on we went, the Holy Spirit and me... practicing saying the right thing instead of the negative, sarcastic angry comment on my lips.  I almost stopped talking for two years because I was such a complainer, pessimistic person.  Then, I began saying the right thing and this is what the Holy Spirit showed me... 

 

One day, as I was running errands pondering, "Faith...An Extreme Sport."  I wondered the acryonym of this phrase.  I sat down at a Costco lunch bench, took out a pen, and wrote on a napkin "faes."   "How do you pronouce that? Faas? F-ă-ĕ-s? F-ā-ē-s?  F-ă-ē-s?  F-ă-e-s?  Face? that's stupid  FACE.....

 

Then it dawned on me in slow motion, "Faith...An Extreme Sport; FAES-it," that is what I had been doing.  As I was facing myself in the mirror of Jesus/the bible, looking at my ways, and allowing him to be my helper with shame, disbelief, taking responsibility for my own actions and reactions, he was making me into his image.  I was FAES'ing it.  As I was looking at me, allowing him to take away the bad, replace it with his goodness, I was being made in his image.  By going back through the hard places in life with him, I was taking up my cross, drinking the cup, and gaining the prize.    I began exploring my personality, character traits, gifts he had placed in me.  I began seeing myself how he sees me, fully accepted and loved in Jesus.  In a race, all the runners run, but only one gets the prize... In ancient times the olympian would be given a laurel leaf placed upon their head to signify they had won their race.  

 

"FAITH... AN EXTREME SPORT" run your race, allow your name to glorify his name  FAES...It.  

THE NAME THING:  Learn who he has named you,

EXPLORE: The wonderful gifts and characteristics he has placed into you,

NOW WHAT:  Enjoy His presence in you and listen to him speaking over you, 

WORK IT OUT:  Run the race by loving the process of becoming who he has created you to be,

JUMP:  Into all he has predestined for you

GOD MOMENTS:  Along the way you will have amazing, intimate moments which will shape and mold you into the amazing person you are